My dear

You’re funny
you’re cute
you’ve a job
that’s cool

I can’t be with you
I’m older and more arrogant
than you

I don’t know how much experience
you have but I think I have more
I have a list of things I’ve done
and know what I’m capable of

I will use you like I’ve used the rest
keep you as an option in case
it doesn’t work with someone else
hook up with you once or a couple of times
kick you to the curb and get back with someone else

Nothing you say or do will
change me
break me
convince me
phase me

I don’t care about you
I don’t even care about myself
there’s only a few people I care about enough
to make some sort of an effort not to resort back to old self
some old teachers remind me
I’m only human

Misconception about Men

“They don’t care.”
“They cheat on me.”
“They’re abusive.”

 

I sat here for once
staring at my screen
receiving nothing but messages
from men about their woman…

 

I think she’s cheating on me
she lies to me all the time
She had sex with another guy
she said he was better in bed
He probably has a bigger penis than I do
that’s why she wants him
She’s pregnant and I don’t
think I’m the father
We had a great time now she
ignores all my messages
She broke up with me for
no reason
She told me she cuts herself
but never told me why

 

I love her and would do anything for her
Me: Does she know that?
I told her, she’s my soulmate
I think about her all the time
I can’t get her out of my mind
why couldn’t she tell me?
Me: Perhaps…
I want your honest opinion
Me: Somethings not right in her head
and she’s seeing someone else

How much of my writing is true

The question is whether or not it was my own idea — and what’s in it for me.

 

Own idea

My thoughts or stories from my life.

Yeah some details are blurry and some things I didn’t write down exactly as it was said. I don’t have the best memory in the world but by no means am I going to bullshit real stories from my┬álife.

Fiction, screenplays, and poems — another story. I can bullshit all I want. If they were based off my life, no one would ever know.

 

Not my idea

Anything academic is bullshitted. I just do whatever they tell me to do because their is a grade involved. I don’t really give a shit about any if the papers I write about. If I did I would write about it on my own time.

 

I love to convince them

Wrong. Especially if I don’t know them or there is like I said — something in it for me. Damn well you bet I’m going to bullshit. Lies sell.

 

But…

If I don’t know you or love you though, I have no need to convince you or try to please me. That is the beauty about writing whatever you want.

Guide to Self-Improvement

If you are like me, you think this is another pointless blog post telling you what to do to make your life better.

 

Like… Who are you? Are you an expert? What works you and other people won’t work for me! Unless I am really sick, how is that helpful?

 

Bingo. That’s the answer.

 

It’s not helpful. You have a functioning brain, mind, and body. The problem is you listen to people tell you, you have problems. You listen to them talk down to you, ignoring the fact they have problems too.

 

What to do?

 

Well, you live in you. You have the ability to create, think, and act for yourself. If something bothers you, you change it. If someone slams the door in your face, look for another. If your friends or so-called allies turn your back on you, find new ones. It’s not going to be easy, nothing ever is. You are you — nothing anyone or anything can take away from you. Nothing you are willing or should surrender to things or people that cause you more harm than good.

 

You own your mind, body, and spirit. No one else knows it. No one else controls it. No matter what they may think or try to have you believe. And please, do not listen to me either. I am typing words on a screen. I can’t guide you. I can’t improve you. I don’t know you. It’s all up to you.

 

Men men

I am pretty much the only girl at the bowling alley
I hear inappropriate comments about 69, Jews, and Nazis
I want to hurl
I think, “That’s why I hate men.”
I know it’s not
Not all men are like that just the drunk ones and ignorant

(same goes for anyone else)

I thank God for Vodka
And I am some person
Who isn’t racist or sexist
Thank my mother for raising me

Twitter vs. Facebook: Which one is better?

To go nuts: (if you’re not a celebrity)
Twitter.

You know few — if any of your followers in real life. You can rant all you want. But if you’re an asshole, you should probably keep your mouth shut…

 

Indulge in your social media habit: (without family/friends/acquaintances looking over your shoulder)
Twitter.

 

Share things with people you actually know/knew:
Facebook.

 

Be less clustered with ideas:
Facebook.

‘Unfollowing’ from news-feed makes it easy.

 

BOTH websites are great: they allow you to share things that no one really cares about.

 

Which one is better?

Your preference — I mean, poison.

Expectation vs Reality – What I really been up too.

Expectation: Studying and writing an essay.
Reality: Reading a paragraph and writing a sentence.

Expectation: Going to dance practice.
Reality: Nail in tire. Sleep instead.

Expectation: I will go home tonight and get some sleep.
Reality: Going to your boyfriends house and having sex.

Expectation: I’m just going to watch television tonight.
Reality: Drinking Vodka and getting extremely drunk.

Expectation: No drunk sex.
Reality: Trying new-weird sex positions.

Expectation: Talking to boyfriend about life, problems, and feelings.
Reality: Arguing with each other. He made a comment about a girls boobs and you called him a disgusting pervert.

Expectation: Not spending money.
Reality: Buying a bunch of really cute clothes in the mall and online you wore once — and decided you look ridiculous in it.

Expectation: Putting a nose stud in. (corkscrew)
Reality: You just can’t fucking do it. Now you have a big red dot on your nose and it looks like a popped zit.

Expectation: Having dinner and going to sleep.
Reality: Trying a mixed drink — something weird like pineapple and Vodka. Mind racing — you stay awake staring at the ceiling for two hours.

Single vs. In a Relationship

Single…
-Text whoever.
-Get drunk all you want.
-Have sex with caution.
-Go places/make changes in your life on your own terms.
-Have more time for a social life, doing things that interest you.
-Spend your money on whatever.
-Eat ice cream for dinner.

 

Relationship…
-You have someone to do fun things with.
-Make plans when to get drunk.
-You can get laid without worrying about STDs or hurt feelings — you know each other.
-Have to figure out how to include them in your plans small/big.
-Do things your partner likes to keep them happy — expect they do the same thing in return.
-Save money for a rainy day.
-Spend an hour discussing what you want for dinner. Settle on fast food because its fast and cheap — and now you’re starving!

Things I don’t care about.

Facebook.
You want to talk about feelings, relationships, and problems in the world — unfollow. I don’t know you. I’m aware. Leave me alone.

Twitter.
Don’t know you. You like my nonsense — cool. Whatever.

Instagram.
It’s just a fucking picture.

Other social media websites.
Really don’t give a shit.

Leaving.
Unless I’m required to be somewhere, I don’t have to be.

Waiting.
Line at Dunkin’ Donuts is too long? Go to the one down the street.

Not talking.
I don’t have anything to say. Be thankful I’m quiet. If I talked, it probably wouldn’t be nice — or too eccentric.

Your opinion.
Been there, done that. Fuck off.